First Promo

An absolutely enormous man was prepared to make his debut in the form of an introductory promo. A colossus in a scarlet karate gi with a helmet and black shroud covering his head and face. He towered over Todd Grisham who had been assigned to interview this deadly warrior. The backstage of the arena is where this was set to take place. There was no doubt that this gigantic human being meant serious business. The look in his eyes made that obvious.

Todd Grisham: Joining now is a man who has a impressive reputation in Japan.  He dominated that scene for years and he makes his EBWF debut Monday Night. This is Tensai.

The feeble interviewer was in awe at the might Tensai but something confused him.

Todd Grisham: But I have to ask. What are they doing here?

The camera scooted over just a smidge to reveal two young women sitting at a small, folded card table. There were two enormous gas station drinks in front of them and a pack of cookies.

Nicole Matthews - 25 years old. Tall and lean. Explosive dynamite!!! Brunette. Multiple time Shimmer Tag Champion. Consumer of slurpee's.
  
Portia Perez - 25 years old. Not so tall but deadly!!! Has hair in a top knot like mid-90's WCW Era Chris Jericho. Also won some titles in place. Devourer of cookies.

Tensai: They are...NINJA.

Both girls pointed down to the pink shirts they were that were tied above their belly buttons. The word "NINJA" was written across them with an air pointing upwards.

Nicole Matthews: Except we're Canadian.

Tensai: No one was supposed to know this!!

Mighty Tensai bellowed with all the rage of an imperialistic ox.

Portia Perez: PRETTY sure they would have figured out that we aren't Asian.

Nicole Matthews: We're here because he bought us cookies and big gulp drinks.

Portia Perez: I like cookies.

Hence for the duo shall be referred to as The Canadian Ninjas and they toasted their big, sweet, liquid fountain drinks to one another.

Todd Grisham: Alright. Let's move along then? Tensai you will make your in ring debut against both Santino and Batista in a triple threat match. You are the most world traveled and you have the experience edge. How do you think you will fare?

The powerful masked man selected his words carefully. Much like selecting the correct piece of sushi. It must first take careful consideration and timing to make a strong impact.

Tensai: I have spent the past eight years in Japan. I fought sumo wrestlers, samurai, kabuki warriors and all manner of beasts and gang members. I made those rings my stomping grounds. I destroyed all of those who came before me. I have returned to America to do the same thing. Santino. Batista. I. Will. SWALLOW YOU.

Portia Perez: Pfffttttttt..

They tried to hold back their guffaws but to no avail. The two ladies burst into laughter.

Tensai: Are you both twelve years old?!

Strong willed Tensai could not stand such a shameful display. He tossed aside his helmet and mask to reveal his bald head and heavily tattooed face with Kanji's that probably meant something tough and scary.

Tensai: It means that I am very monster like in the way that I approach confrontation! Not what you think! I AM LORD TENSAI!

Nicole Matthews: More like Lord Hentai.

The footage paused while a caption appeared on the screen.

Hentai: A work of anime or manga that contains sexual or pornographic art.

Todd Grisham: And Portia actually has her debut match as well.

Tensai: NINJA #1 WILL DESTORY..

The Destroyer from the Land of the Rising Sun was momentarily baffled in a rare moment of confusion.

Tensai: Who is she wrestling?

Todd Grisham: Kaitlyn.

Tensai: NINJA #1 WILL DESTROY KAITLYN.

Portia Perez: I will destroy Kaitlyn.

Tensai: Is that all you're going to say?!

Portia Perez: What is with this Ninja #1 business? And I don't really know her, man.

Tensai: Who cares?! She is your opponent! You will defeat her! You will defeat her in the most destructive manner possible! All must quake fear as you approach the ring!

She was no longer able to take anymore of Tensai's silver tongue lecturing. The Canadian lass rolled her eyes and threw up her hands.

Portia Perez: Alright! Alright! I'm going to kill her, right? I'm going to kick her so hard that she flies into the third row and then I'm going to set her house on fire. Is that good enough?

Tensai: Acceptable. The Canadian Ninja's will prove dominate! BAKA!

Nicole Matthews: We actually want to call ourselves The Samurai Pizza Cats.

Tensai: NEVER!!

Todd Grisham: Very bold statements. Are there any parting words you would like to say to the EBWF Universe?

Tensai: TENSAI. CANADIAN NINJAS. ICHI-BAAAAAAAAN!

After his mighty war cry sprang from his throat Tensai lifted one of his thunderous fists and brought it crashing down onto the table the girls were sitting at. It crumbled to pieces and made a mess of their junk food which left the ladies none too pleased. Tensai walked away from the scene and began preparations for his battle.

Nicole Matthews: He better going to get us more cookies and big gulps!

Portia Perez: Samurai Pizza Cats! Not Canadian Ninjas!

The EBWF Universe would soon be shaken to it's core by Lord Tensai and The Canadian Samurai Pizza Cat Ninjas.